Winter 2015 - Are You Really Listening?

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11 Feb 2015 14:57 - 11 Feb 2015 15:39 #13 by Molly
Molly created the topic: Winter 2015 - Are You Really Listening?
During this time of the reemergence of longer days and light, I want to thank you all for your support and interest in resiliency. As Director of the Al Siebert Resiliency Center, I am reflective and celebratory on ASRC's accomplishments this past year. It is my hope the message we provide in our resiliency work and newsletters will bring joy and continued learning for each and every one of you. May the year 2015 bring you peace and joy.

Are you really listening?
In loving memory of my father who passed away this year, I wanted to bring to you one of my father's self-learned lessons. He carried business cards,"Making the Human Connection." On the back of the business card there is a question: "Are you really listening?" When he created his business cards years ago and showed them to me, I thought to myself, "Oh Dad, you and your Toastmasters...." It took me some years to realize the message he was delivering to me and to others was a precious gift if we were astute enough to understand his gift to humanity.

Along with the realization of what my father's message was to us all. I recently came across a quote from a dear friend, Hiro, written almost eight years ago: "With some magical power beyond our comprehension, we attract what we think about. Synchronicity is life's response to your expectation. Life is always responsive."

Then I remembered the reference to the creation of the word "serendipity" in The Resiliency Advantage. Serendipity was coined in 1754 by Horace Walpole from the fairy tale, Three Princes of Serendip. According to Walpole, there are three elements that must be present for serendipity to occur. "First, something unexpected or accidental happens to you. Second, your perceptiveness, good sense, and wisdom (sagacity) lead you to discover the third element -- an unexpected benefit, gift, or blessing in what happened."

Have you ever considered what the experience and potential gift that a conversation with others can bring to you? Whether it is a conversation or interaction, each connection we have with another can be an enriching experience if you are prepared. From an analytical perspective, conversations with another are a teaching or learning experience. Even the teacher of the conversation can learn. By analyzing from a teacher-student perspective what the other person is saying and/or doing, you can enhance your own learning experience on the spot and make your response more meaningful. The relationship between you and the other person can deepen using the perspective of what you can learn from this moment. Nobel laureate Ilya Prigogine, who is mentioned in Chapter 13 of The Resiliency Advantage, discovered that "living systems self-organize with internal structures that harmonize with energies they take in and process." Conversations can be the "energies" that provide new information or another perspective not previously known.

Curiosity with an open mind and asking good questions are resiliency skills we have within us to bring to the conversation. By making the most of a prepared mindset along with these resiliency skills, you can discover, learn and enhance your experience even more. Before each conversation, open your heart and your mind to learning. Is your mindset ready to "really listen" to what the other person is saying? By really listening, your response from the conversation can improve your course of life. Thank you, Dad, for teaching this valuable life lesson.

~ Molly Siebert, Director
Al Siebert Resiliency Center
"My life sings of connections with life, spirit and you!"

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